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HOUSEHOLD CHORES ARE INEVITABLE, BUT WHO SHOULD DO THEM?

The question on household chores dates back to the creation of the world.

At the early stage of human community there was matriarchy there. That means that women dominated over men. But with the development of agriculture, cattle-breeding and metal-working the things became different. Primitive society changed into tribal system, men gained power not only in economy, but also in family and society. From that very period it became a tradition to separate chores: men did all hard work, and women did all the work about the house.

With the development of the society things became more complicated. Men began working outside homes and women went on keeping houses, that is, to raise children, cook, wash up, wash the clothes, clean up rooms, dust the furniture, mop the flour and what not.

The state of things remained unchanged for centuries. But in the middle of the twentieth century women got sick and tired of slaving over the house. Such movement as Women’s Emancipation took place. Women began struggling for their rights in society. As a result, on the one hand, now men and women are almost equal in rights: both can have careers, on the other hand, the question of household chores has never been so burning.

When both man and woman are busy all day long making career, it is a real problem who should do the housework. Traditionally, the work about the house is considered to be women’s responsibility. Though things changed, men are not inclined to notice it. They continue to believe that it is women who should or even must do housework. That is the reason of tensity in family.

In the beginning, when first dating, couples generally do everything together: shop, cook, clean, walk the dog… But shortly after saying vows — or even before that — they fall into more familiar, stereotypical roles. Part of this has to do with our role models: our parents. But another part has to do with practicality. People naturally gravitate toward things they are good at, that is women cook, clean, wash, shop; men – repair their cars, and fix simple electric appliances. Maximum of what we make them do is empty the trash and change light bulbs. It proves that splitting tasks along gender lines is not a very good thing.

But some believe it is. This opinion is shared by couples’ therapists. They are sure that couples do not have to do the same chores but they should “sweat equally”. They suggest sitting down and figuring out what the strengths are, who does what and then dividing the task fairly. One rule is to be flexible. Sometimes the spouse has to do some thing even if he hates it. And the second rule is to be nice. If the spouse is asked to do something he should do it without nagging. But there can be objection to the second rule because asking husband for help gives the impression that the household chores are only women job and responsibility. Instead women should ask their husbands to do the share.

It is a very controversial subject who should do the household chores and every family solves the problem in its own way.